For years I’ve been hearing sermons and talks on how Mary ‘keeping things in her heart’ meant that she was quietly and submissively just accepting things. But, she was keeping the revolution of Christ in her heart. That’s what she was keeping inside; that's what she had to keep in her heart, her soul, her body. So, not for one minute longer will I subscribe to the narrative that in order for Mary to be "quietly accepting" things, it meant that she was this passive, submissive woman who didn't show stress, exhaustion, anxiety, or confusion. Perhaps in the moment she silently took in what someone said, but when she got home, what happened? Or, when it was just her and God? .... How scared Mary must have been when she started feeling contractions (or some form of whatever it is she would have felt), and perhaps how she didn’t want to tell Joseph and worry him because she didn’t want it to be happening yet…because they had nowhere to go to have the baby. She remembers hearing Jesus’ first cries, holding Him and watching as the animals in the stable gathered around; His first worshipers. She remembers how badly she just wanted to sleep when shepherds arrived, who wanted to hold Him. She remembers being scared by these men who approached her in their fancy robes, but then how she relaxed when they knelt down on the dirty hay and looked at her Son in awe. Man after man came to visit her Son and each time Mary looked first at Jesus and then to Joseph. Sometimes she would catch Joseph’s eye, and sometimes she would just observe him. And it was in those moments that she realized just how revolutionary God is. That instead of using the body of a man, He chose the body of a woman. And instead of using a mighty and rich leader, He would use a poor and helpless baby. And she realized that this revolution that the prophets declared before her would take time. She asked herself: I mean, Mary, what were you expecting? That Herod would all of a sudden have a change of heart, welcome you into his palace and your Son would take His rightful throne? “Yes,” she admits to herself. “That is what I was hoping.” But as she “pondered what this meant in her heart” she started to realize that perhaps this was going to take much longer than she expected. This whole time she was pregnant, she thought that a king or a Pharisee would come along and take her Son to train Him; to lead Him. But in that moment she realized it was her. She was the one who was going to train Him, lead Him and guide Him. She handed Jesus to Joseph and stepped outside of the stable to get some air. She started crying and worrying about how she was going to raise the Son of God. Her breath quickened, she cupped her forehead and then she looked up. She hadn’t noticed how dark it was or how bright and clear the sky was. She tilted her head back and saw the star. And she started to realize just how big this all is and how it’s so much bigger than herself. She went back into the stable, hugged Joseph, took Jesus into her arms and kissed His head while tears rolled down her cheek. And that’s when it really hit her (because lest we forget, Mary was not all-knowing). And for the first time since Jesus was born she’s silent as she gazed in wonder at the Great I Am. The picture is of a statue I found tucked away at Falling Water, a Frank Lloyd Wright house in Pennsylvania.
1 Comment
Richard Brown
5/14/2022 01:00:01 pm
I love FLW and Falling Water House. I am a Catholic with very sincere options about abortions. Do you have e-mail for my notes and thoughts? You can help me spread the message. Thank you Richard.
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hey.my moto is summarized best by these words:
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.” -Brene Brown thanks Brene. you're quite the gal. Past Musings
July 2020
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